Oh, hello holidays. Nice to see you again. Its been what — a whole year? You’re looking great. No. Really. You are.
If you don’t see your family often, the time from Thanksgiving to New Year’s often serves as a way to show off how fantastic everything is going in your life.
Your job? Wonderful.
Your health? Never felt better.
Your love life? (Awkward pause.)
If you happen to be single, and perhaps have been for a while, there are a few ways to concisely squash the “Why are you still single?” question and escape relatively unscathed. We’ve roused up a few quips for the next time your nosy Aunt asks you to pass the potatoes and explain why you’re alone.
1. I’m just lucky, I guess.
2. Glad you asked! I’ve been vetting a few candidates and might make an offer soon. I’ll keep you posted.
3. I’m taking some time to reevaluate my list of non-negotiables.
4. (Start crying uncontrollably.)
5. I’m ridiculously picky.
6. Oh, I just broke it off with someone. Still in mourning.
7. My therapist thinks it has to do with how I was brought up.
8. Because I deserve the best and won’t settle for less.
9. I’ve noticed that monogamy gets in the way of my sex life.
10. (My dog, cat, hamster, bird) hasn’t approved of anyone yet, and what they say goes.
11. I really, really, REALLY hate sharing a bed.
12. I’m on the Clooney track. Check back in with me in 25 years or so.
13. I have strange habits (and then swiftly change the topic).
14. It’s a chemical thing. My pheromones just don’t match up with anyone.
Do you have a perfect comeback? Let us know!
